Insights & Information

Middle school candidate: Gospel the 'most important thing'

Toby and Melissa Pegram and Grayson

Toby, Melissa, and Grayson Pegram

Toby Pegram will never forget the moment when God’s still, quiet voice carried across the pews of an inner-city church in Pittsburgh, Pa.

“It was in my senior year at Northwest Guilford High School and I was sitting in the back of a church on a mission trip,” he said. “I saw God working in the lives of people and realized, ‘That’s what I want to be doing for the rest of my life.’ ”

At age 29, Pegram took the latest step in his ministry journey by becoming the new pastor of The Crossing middle school ministry at Triad Baptist after the church overwhelmingly approved his hiring in voting Jan. 21-25. He officially joined the staff Feb. 2.

The position is Pegram’s third working in a church after two internships. He served part time as associate high school pastor at Hickory Grove Baptist Church in Concord, N.C., from 2008 to 2011 and full time as youth pastor at Chestnut Ridge Baptist Church in Elyria, Ohio, from 2011 to April 2014.

Adding to that experience are internships at First Baptist Church in Cary, N.C., and First Baptist Church in his hometown of Summerfield, N.C., where he was ordained in November 2007.

Pegram, who began attending Triad in April 2014 with his wife, Melissa, and 16-month-old son, Grayson, learned about the opening on the church’s website. Since returning from Ohio, he’s been working at Tuesday Morning, a retail chain that sells brand-name home furnishings, small appliances, and gifts. Melissa is a nurse at Brenner Children’s Hospital.

“We felt like God was ready for us to move on and move back closer to our family,” Pegram said of the move back to North Carolina. “I wanted to serve at Triad Baptist Church because I know God is working here,.

“I love serving middle school students and want to be there for them. I’ve worked with middle schoolers for seven out of the 10 years I’ve been in ministry.”

Pegram counts teaching, leadership, and discernment among the spiritual gifts he brings to middle school ministry. He’s a 2010 graduate of The College at Southeastern in Wake Forest, N.C., where he earned a bachelor’s degree in the history of ideas and biblical studies. While he’s an only child, Pegram’s parents still live in Brown Summit, N.C.

Ministry philosophy

Pegram said his philosophy of ministry has four elements:

  • Encountering Christ: Teaching the Bible in a relevant and interesting way to engage and disciple middle schoolers so they encounter Christ and see His work in their lives.
  • Experiencing Community: Creating opportunities for students to be around each other, talk about their lives, and feel like they have a place they belong.
  • Engaging the Culture: Spreading the good news of Jesus Christ locally and globally by serving and sharing faith with others.
  • Supporting the Family: Working with parents to help their students become stronger disciples for Christ.

At the core of each is the same truth Pegram shared in a Jan. 15 message during Triad’s Wednesday evening service about the baptism of Jesus by John the Baptist: that what changed the world and lives then and continues to do so now remains Jesus Christ.

“The most important thing we can teach middle schoolers is the gospel,” Pegram said. “Knowing who Jesus is and what He did and why we need His power and presence in our lives is the most central thing, the foundation of our lives. I hope I can demonstrate that in my life and through what I teach them.”

As a pastor, Pegram thinks it’s important to connect with people where they are and one of the ways he does that is through sports, both as fan and participant. A former high school athlete, his favorite teams include Duke basketball and football, the Atlanta Braves, Carolina Panthers, and Cleveland Cavaliers. In the what-most-folks-don’t-know-about-me category, the factoid that tops the list for Pegram is a second place finish once in the U.S. Southeastern Region competition for best beard.

Addressing one of the hot-button issues in church ministry these days — how to connect with the culture without being indistinguishable from it — Pegram said social media has a role as long as it’s Christ-centered and the content delivered through it doesn’t add to or take away from the gospel message. One of the themes of his Jan. 15 message was that Christ alone is enough (a point missed by the Sadducees and Pharisees of his illustration, and that their modern-day equivalents also ignore).

“I think the best way to engage middle schoolers is to be where they’re at,” Pegram said. “That means spiritually and physically. Each student is going to be at a different point in their walk with Christ so hopefully in our ministry we can speak to each person at some point. Also most of the kids are on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or other social media so it’s important to use those as tools to speak to them. I never would use something sinful or offensive to try and reach students but if it’s not inherently wrong or sinful then it’s fair to use.”

Pegram said he and Melissa are a ministry team.

“Melissa has always been very involved in ministry,” he said. “She has taught Sunday School and led discipleship groups. Her big passion is investing in the girls’ lives and discipling them. She will have them over to the house to bake or go out shopping but talk to them about their walk with Christ in the process, and I know she’s excited about the opportunity to make the same kind of connections and be used of God to have the same kind of impact at Triad.”

Phase 2 Shot of TBC B&W 17

Join us Sunday at

9:00am Traditional Worship
10:30am Contemporary Worship